Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize