Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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