I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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