Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
the room spins SO much faster in panama
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
