I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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