i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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