My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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