Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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