Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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