you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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