Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
