Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize
