Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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