I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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