i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Randomize
