I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he shaved USA in his pubs
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
