I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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