so that wasnt chicken after all
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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