I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
