found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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