You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize