Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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