Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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