And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
