dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
it was like his penis was on wheels.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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