No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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