yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!