mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
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I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
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I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
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