Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
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He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
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Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I pour the whiskey from now on