Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize