Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
