the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
That accounts for only three of the penises
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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