just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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