38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...