I bet he comes in French.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
