We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
why is half of my head shaved?
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