So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize