You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
