I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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