margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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