dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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