I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
why do cheetos always look like penises
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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