I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize