You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
