Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize