Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I am available for nakedness
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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