nut hugger
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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