If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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