A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I will die if light touches me.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
