The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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