I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I have post one night stand depression
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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